This statement that has been making it's way around like the flu for decades and plagues our minds can't be from the Bible, can it?
"We can't love others unless we love ourselves."
WHAT? How can that be? I'm sure the Bible says at least once to "deny yourself" (Mt 16:24; Mk 8:34; Rom 6). Who on earth, if he loved himself, would want to deny himself?
We've got it twisted. Let's take a look at the "love" chapter... no, not 1 Cor 13.... 1 John 4.
7Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God. 8 Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love. 9In this the love of God was made manifest among us, that God sent his only Son into the world, so that we might live through him. 10In this is love, not that we have loved God but that he loved us and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins. 11Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. 12 No one has ever seen God; if we love one another, God abides in us and his love is perfected in us.
13 By this we know that we abide in him and he in us, because he has given us of his Spirit. 14And we have seen and testify that the Father has sent his Son to be the Savior of the world. 15 Whoever confesses that Jesus is the Son of God, God abides in him, and he in God. 16So we have come to know and to believe the love that God has for us. God is love, and whoever abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him. 17By this is love perfected with us, so that we may have confidence for the day of judgment, because as he is so also are we in this world. 18There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love. 19 We love because he first loved us. 20 If anyone says, "I love God," and hates his brother, he is a liar; for he who does not love his brother whom he has seen cannot love God whom he has not seen. 21And this commandment we have from him: whoever loves God must also love his brother.
Deeeeep. Now read it again.
Did you see anything about loving yourself in there? I didn't. I saw a lot about loving God and loving my brothers. I also saw "We love because he first loved us." Why do we love? Because we love ourselves? No! Because GOD loved US. That's how we are able to love.
Question:
Do you think that Jesus would've died on the cross if he loved himself?
Or to put it more in perspective: Would you die on a cross if you valued your life?
Jesus died on the cross because he loved the Father, not himself. (Yes, in the sense of the trinity he loved himself because he is God, but that's not the point I'm getting at here.) If Jesus loved himself, I'm pretty convinced he would've taken the glory Satan offered him when he was tempted in the desert.
If we love ourselves it is nearly impossible to love others. As one of my professors puts it:
"What's the opposite of love? Self-love."
